你不需要记录一切

Screenshot: @coldplay, ‘X’. 截图：@coldplay, 'X'. I’m sure by now you’ve seen this video of Paris on New Year’s Eve, where everyone is so busy filming the countdown and fireworks on their phones that they forget to experience them. It’s surreal. 我相信你现在已经看过巴黎除夕夜的这段视频了，每个人都忙着用手机拍摄倒计时和烟花，却忘了去感受它们。这太不真实了。 This is obviously something that’s been happening for over a decade now—people documenting events instead of being in the moment. 这显然是十多年来一直在发生的事情--人们记录事件，而不是身临其境。 But it’s not just events anymore. People document但这已不再是单纯的事件。人们记录 everything now. Every mundane moment of their lives. What they wear. What they eat. What they buy. 现在的一切。他们生活中的每一个平凡时刻他们穿什么吃什么他们买什么 And as well as ordinary things people now feel the need to document profoundly personal moments, from除了普通的事物，人们现在还觉得有必要记录下深刻的个人时刻，从 health scares to mental breakdowns to their first time seeing a baby after it’s born: 从健康恐慌到精神崩溃，再到孩子出生后的第一次见面： Of course influencers are the ultimate example of this. 当然，有影响力的人就是这方面的最终例子。 Especially annoying to me are the couples who document their entire relationships online. 尤其让我恼火的是那些在网上记录整个恋爱过程的情侣。 I will never understand the amount of comments saying我永远无法理解有多少评论说 couple goals and how do I find this! to the most staged, rehearsed, insincere moments I’ve ever seen. 情侣目标，我怎么找到这个的！这是我见过的最做作、最排练、最不真诚的时刻。 I can’t get my head around applauding people who set up a camera in the corner to record themselves being romantic. 我无法理解那些在角落里架起摄像机记录自己浪漫的人。 Like everyone就像每个人一样 praising this husband for how caring he is as he films his pregnant wife crying for TikTok. And gushing over couples who grind up every intimate moment into content—pregnancy reveals, marriage proposals, telling my girlfriend I love you for the first time. The most meaningful experiences in human life—things that happen once, twice, never again—corrupted by thoughts like is the camera getting my good angle**.** 称赞这位丈夫是多么体贴，因为他为 TikTok 拍摄了怀孕妻子哭泣的画面。对那些把每一个亲密时刻都打磨成内容的夫妻赞不绝口--怀孕揭秘、求婚、第一次对女朋友说我爱你。人类生活中最有意义的经历--发生过一次、两次，再也不会发生的事情--都会被一些想法所破坏，比如摄像机是否拍到了我的好角度。 But worse, the absolute worst, are the parents, the influencer parents who document their kids’ entire childhoods online. 但更糟糕的，绝对是那些在网上记录孩子整个童年的父母，那些有影响力的父母。 Parents who share and monetise every milestone, every emotion, every phase, every tantrum, sometimes every父母们分享每一个里程碑、每一种情绪、每一个阶段、每一次发脾气，有时甚至是每一次，并将其货币化。 day of their children’s lives. Who let strangers rate and review their children (“YOU MADE THEM CRY! reading mean comments!”). Who shove a vlogging camera in their baby’s face from the moment they are born (“FIRST 48 HOURS WITH OUR NEWBORN IS NOW LIVE!”). Who document their 6 year-old’s gender transition (“IT’S NOT A PHASE!”). 孩子们生活的每一天。让陌生人评价和评论他们的孩子（"你让他们哭了！读着刻薄的评论！"）。从孩子一出生就把视频摄像头对着孩子的脸（"FIRST 48 HOURS WITH OUR NEWBORN IS NOW LIVE!"）。记录自己 6 岁孩子性别转换的视频（"这不是一个阶段！"）。 Trust me there’s nothing worse than this influencer who accidentally posted footage of her forcing her son to cry for the camera: 相信我，没有什么比这位不小心发布了自己强迫儿子对着镜头哭泣的视频的影响者更糟糕的了： Influencers are of course the most extreme examples—but this impulse is so ingrained in everyone now. 当然，"影响者 "是最极端的例子，但这种冲动现在已深入每个人的心中。 This pressure to post everything. And I think it’s a massive cause of anxiety for Gen Z. 这种什么都要发布的压力。我认为这是 Z 世代焦虑的一个重要原因。 There’s a sense now that something现在有一种感觉 didn’t happen if you don’t share it. 如果你不分享，它就不会发生。 There are young people who wouldn’t understand going to an event, travelling somewhere, being in a relationship, if they couldn’t post about it.如果不能发布相关信息，有些年轻人就不会理解参加活动、去某地旅行、谈恋爱等。 They would not see the point. They simply cannot conceive of a life that exists without an audience consuming it. 他们不会明白这一点。他们根本无法想象没有观众消费的生活。 Like, for example, the popular belief now that if your boyfriend doesn’t post photos of you比如，现在流行的观点认为，如果你的男朋友不发布你的照片 he’s cheating or doesn’t really love you. Or it’s a red flag if you meet someone and they aren’t on social media (just me who thinks this is a major green flag?) 他在欺骗你，或者并不真的爱你。或者说，如果你遇到的人不在社交媒体上，这也是一个红旗（只有我认为这是一个重要的绿旗？） And we’re so addicted and used to reflexively recording everything that we end up excusing the weirdest behaviour. They just want to remember the fireworks! Really? 我们如此沉迷于并习惯于条件反射地记录一切，以至于我们最终原谅了最奇怪的行为。他们只是想记住烟花！真的吗？ There’s crowds of people all capturing the same thing; they will likely never watch that video back, and if they’re posting it online that’s not for memories; it’s for attention. 有很多人都在拍摄同一件事；他们很可能永远都不会回看那段视频，如果他们把视频发到网上，那不是为了回忆，而是为了吸引眼球。 It’s the same thing as ‘90s camcorders! In what world! Camcorders didn’t come with this urge, with this compulsion to constantly update people, with tying your self-worth to likes and followers. You’ll regret it if you don’t record it! Sure, capture occasional moments; keep them for you. 这和 90 年代的摄像机是一回事！什么世界摄像机并没有这种冲动，没有这种强迫症，没有这种不断向人们提供最新信息的强迫症，没有这种把自我价值与点赞和粉丝联系在一起的强迫症。如果不记录下来，你会后悔的！当然，偶尔捕捉瞬间，留作纪念。 But I think if this generation is on track to regret anything it will be the time we wasted documenting and editing and filtering and marketing ourselves for social media. 但我认为，如果说这一代人会有什么遗憾的话，那一定是我们浪费在记录、编辑、过滤以及在社交媒体上推销自己的时间。 Time we will never get back. 我们再也回不去的时光 My bet is we won’t look back at our hundreds of thousands of Instagram Stories and Snapchats and Boomerangs with fondness that we filmed these moments, but with aching regret that we didn’t fully feel them. 我敢打赌，我们在回顾自己成千上万的 Instagram Stories、Snapchats 和 Boomerangs 时，不会因为拍下了这些瞬间而深感欣慰，却会因为没有完全感受到这些瞬间而痛心遗憾。 Because look at the people who do document their entire lives! 因为看看那些一辈子都在记录的人吧！ Very often these perfect influencers are falling apart behind the camera.很多时候，这些完美的有影响力的人在镜头背后却分崩离析。 Again and again, perfect online couples seem to implode out of nowhere. 完美的网恋情侣似乎一次又一次地突然内讧。 Influencers who dedicate every waking moment to documenting their identity have no idea who they actually are. 那些每时每刻都在记录自己身份的 "影响者 "根本不知道自己到底是谁。 Women who post pictures of their faces from every angle and in every possible lighting hate how they look. 那些从各个角度、在各种可能的光线下发布脸部照片的女性讨厌自己的样子。 Families who capture every moment of their perfect lives get caught in捕捉完美生活每一刻的家庭陷入了 scandal after scandal. And still we keep falling for it: the illusion, the performance, the front. Almost 70% of Gen Z say social media makes them feel stressed, anxious and depressed; over half want to be influencers. What’s happening here? 丑闻一桩接一桩。而我们却依然沉迷于其中：假象、表演和幌子。近 70% 的 Z 世代说，社交媒体让他们感到压力、焦虑和沮丧；一半以上的人想成为有影响力的人。这到底是怎么回事？ We so easily forget the emotional cost of sharing everything; we so easily forget that those who do are compensating. 我们如此轻易地忘记了分享一切的情感代价；我们如此轻易地忘记了分享的人是在补偿。 Which is why I also really resent this assumption that people who don’t post much on social media are insecure or unhappy or hiding something. 因此，我也非常反感这种假设，即认为不常在社交媒体上发帖的人没有安全感、不快乐或在隐瞒什么。 Often it’s the opposite. I’m pretty sure those with the best relationships post about them the least. 通常情况恰恰相反。我敢肯定，人际关系最好的人发布的信息最少。 That those with real confidence and self-love don’t need to post thousands of selfies to prove it. 那些真正自信自爱的人不需要发布成千上万张自拍来证明自己。 And that truly empowered people don’t depend on external validation for every feeling or opinion or decision they make. 真正有能力的人不会因为自己的每一种感觉、观点或决定而依赖于外界的认可。 Isn’t that just a basic rule in life? 这不就是人生的基本准则吗？ That those who are the loudest about their achievements and relationships and morality often have the most doubts about them? 那些对自己的成就、人际关系和道德最大声疾呼的人，往往对自己的成就、人际关系和道德最怀疑？ And if I know one thing it’s that if you’re experiencing a genuinely moving moment, if you’re really如果我知道一件事，那就是如果你正在经历一个真正令人感动的时刻，如果你真的 in it, the absolute last thing you want or think about doing is taking out your phone, cutting through it and cheapening it. 在这种情况下，你最不愿意或最不想做的事情就是拿出手机，划破它，让它变得廉价。 The best love is quiet. The best confidence is quiet. And so are the lives with the most meaning. 最好的爱是安静的。最好的自信是安静的。最有意义的生活也是如此。 And anyway, here’s the truth: nobody cares about your life. They really don’t. I’m sorry but they watch your fireworks story for half a second. 总之，事实是：没有人关心你的生活。他们真的不关心。对不起，他们只看你的烟花故事半秒钟。 They hover over your selfie and then swipe to someone else’s. 它们会在你的自拍照上盘旋，然后刷到别人的自拍照上。 They skip through the concert you posted. They look at your life and immediately think about theirs. 他们会跳过你发布的音乐会。他们看到你的生活，马上就会想到他们的生活。 The people who actually care are the ones you don’t need to perform or prove anything to. 真正关心你的人是你不需要表现或证明什么的人。 Strangers don’t care about you, and that’s a fundamental truth social media platforms depend on us forgetting. 陌生人并不关心你，这是社交媒体平台赖以生存的基本真理，我们却忘记了这一点。 Maybe it’s also too depressing for some people to accept. But personally I find it a relief. 也许对有些人来说，这也太压抑了，无法接受。但就我个人而言，我觉得这是一种解脱。 You don’t need to document everything! Nobody cares anyway! 你不需要记录一切！反正也没人在乎！ And I think young girls need a reminder that this pressure to constantly post and update is very new; this pressure to live your life and also perform and market it to everyone at the same time; you are the first generation to feel it this intensely, and, also, you can free yourself from it. 我认为年轻女孩们需要提醒自己，这种不断发布和更新的压力是非常新的；这种既要过好自己的生活，又要表现自己，同时还要向所有人推销自己的压力；你们是第一代强烈感受到这种压力的人，而且，你们也可以从中解脱出来。 It’s unnecessary. And these influencers who do post everything are这是不必要的。而这些什么都发的有影响力的人是 not people to aspire to. 而不是人们所向往的。 If they influence you of anything it should be to not copy their deranged behaviour and document your entire life online. 如果说他们影响了你什么，那就是不要模仿他们的疯狂行为，不要在网上记录你的全部生活。 You don’t want to be anything like people who你不想成为像那些 bring ring lights to hospital to give birth. Who turn their father’s funeral into a photoshoot (#ptsd!). 带着环形灯去医院生产。把父亲的葬礼变成拍照（#ptsd！）。 Who hold their newborn baby with one hand and scroll through their Instagram likes with the other. 一手抱着新生儿，一手在 Instagram 上点赞。 Don’t start heading in that direction, because there’s no life there. 不要朝那个方向走，因为那里没有生命。 These people have traded privacy and sometimes their own human decency for an existence designed entirely for strangers. 这些人以隐私，有时甚至以自己的人格尊严为代价，换取了完全为陌生人设计的生活。 Their lives are often superficial and empty in exchange. 他们的生活换来的往往是肤浅和空虚。 Aspire to be different! 渴望与众不同！ Aspire to be someone who gets so caught up in the moment they forget to share it; who protects their personal life while everyone else hands theirs over so freely; who can see the value in a moment without needing strangers to validate it for them. 立志成为这样的人，他们沉浸在当下，忘记了分享；他们保护自己的私生活，而其他人却把自己的私生活随意交出去；他们能看到当下的价值，而不需要陌生人来验证。 Be someone rare. 成为罕见的人。 It’s a cruel trick of modern life to convince us that everyone cares what we’re doing, all the time; that everyone is deeply invested in how we live and how we identify and how we feel. 现代生活的一个残酷伎俩就是让我们相信，每个人无时无刻都在关心我们在做什么；每个人都对我们的生活方式、身份认同和感受深感关切。 Seriously believing that is enough to make anyone mentally ill. 说真的，相信这些足以让任何人精神失常。 And looking at famous influencers with fans who看看那些拥有粉丝的知名影响者，他们 are that invested, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. 我不希望任何人有这样的经历。 So put the camera down. Don’t document everything. 所以，放下相机。不要什么都记录下来。 Stop selling your life off so cheaply to strangers. Keep some things sacred. 不要再向陌生人廉价出售你的生活。保留一些神圣的东西。 Let some memories fade and look back at them through fuzzy nostalgia instead of the cheap glare of an iPhone camera roll. 让一些记忆褪色，通过模糊的怀旧而不是 iPhone 相机卷的廉价强光来回顾它们。 Enjoy the fireworks. 欣赏烟花